Dear Tina,
Well we knew it had to end sometime. No longer will we cap off our Tuesday nights with cheeky dialogue and flirty musical numbers. Starting next week our options will be cut down from the greatest new show of the 2009-2010 television season to repeats of NCIS and two-hour long episodes of Hell’s Kitchen. Tonight the season finale of Glee aired on FOX and while I am still waiting for Ryan Murphy to supply his audience with a Groff/Michele duet that leaves Lionel Richie out of the equation, he still managed to fill us with boundless excitement for the show’s return next fall; an eagerness that will only be reinforced with each passing week as we trod our way through Gordon Ramsay challenging his contestants to make spaghetti with marinara sauce.
A lot was at stake tonight. A shot at the Regionals trophy. Relationships on the brink of ending or beginning. Babies coming out of wombs. And on top of all that, Jonathan Groff taught me that if I ever met a man with hair like his, I would be hard-pressed to turn down a marriage proposal. Your effort has been duly noted Ryan Murphy. Noted, and greatly appreciated. Let’s take a look.
The episode begins with the news that Coach Sue Sylvester will be one of the judges at the upcoming Regionals competition. While Will sees this as a manipulation on Sue’s part to take down the glee club, Sue informs him that it is her celebrity that landed her the gig and his assertion that she will not play by the rules is unwarranted. “You leaked our set list at Sectionals!” “I have no memory of that.” When the news spreads to the students, they get into a funk so deep not even a reprise of “Give up the Funk” complete with brightly colored costumes and freestyle dancing can carry them forward. At the first annual Regionals set list selection night (hosted by Mr. Schuester at his home–bordering on inappropriate), the club gloomily declares defeat. An evening that was supposed to be dedicated to reconciling their eclectic discography into one cohesive, ensemble based routine, becomes a cry fest with the losers saying goodbye to the popular kids who they know will go back to ignoring them come Monday morning. Hmm where have I seen this before? “You’re such a bitch Claire.” “Why? For telling the truth?!” Though I haven’t been the biggest supporter of Tina because I find she tends to suck the life out of her scenes with her unimaginative interpretation of the script (too harsh?), she struck a chord with me when she said being part of something special makes you special. Whether or not the rest of the world thinks they’re lame, performing arts extracurriculars give many students an identity, something to embrace as part of their high school experience that is unique to most others’. Even if you have to twist your best friend’s arm to convince her to come support you, there is something special about taking part in something most people would never dare try.
Of course all of this emotion puts Mr. Schuester into a tizzy and he goes to the office of the one woman who always knows just what to say. Former love interest, still virgin, guidance counselor Emma Pillsbury reminds Will that the feeling of doing something you love is way more important than winning or losing, a principle he himself had been drilling into the students’ heads all year long. Whether it was her sage advice or the superfluous amount of bows on her ensemble that opened his eyes, Will tells Emma that he misses her. Unfortunately Emma has moved on and is currently seeing her dentist, Carl Howell. To be played by John Stamos in season 2. The only cliffhanger here is how many episodes do I have to wait until Brittany refers to him as Uncle Jesse. I hope none.
A depressed Will manages this bevy of emotions with a long drive, unbothered by the fact that a portion of his car is scraping against the pavement causing a continuous line of sparks to follow his path. He turns on the radio and finds “Don’t Stop Believin” by Journey. Hey! That’s the song from the pilot! Rather than handling this coincidence like a man, like Jerry Maguire did when “Free Fallin'” came on the radio, Will breaks down and cries. And because it’s Glee and it is always Will’s responsibility to decide the theme for the week, his lady tears are followed by an epiphany. New Directions will present a medley of Journey for the Regionals competition. Because they’ve gone on a journey. “Because who cares what happens when we get there when the getting there has been so much fun.” God, what I wouldn’t give to be a part of this show.
Shortly before this, Finn finds Rachel in the hallway and tells her that as the self-appointed leader, the glee club needed her that night at Mr. Schuester’s to inspire them and instead all she did was wallow. She could have taken this opportunity to break into “Mr. Big Stuff ” by Jean Knight but instead she went the more positive route and sealed the moment with a kiss. And we had our first glimpse at what Finn and Rachel might be like as a couple if she can manage to leave her kitty themed his and hers calendars at home.
At Regionals, we are introduced to the panel of judges which includes local news anchor Rod Remington, Olivia Newton John, Josh Groban, and of course internationally ranked cheerleading coach, Sue Sylvester. So obviously the theme was people who think they’re celebrities. New Directions will be competing against hot shots Vocal Adrenaline and the lesser known Aural Intensity who will be presenting a mash up of Olivia Newton John and Josh Groban songs. You can’t write this stuff! Oh wait, they did.
When it comes time for New Directions to perform, Finn and Rachel anxiously wait outside the auditorium for their entrance. Standing in front of separate doors, Finn seizes this opportunity to come over and tell Rachel that he loves her. Of course this only fueled the joy we were already going to experience when the two came out singing “Faithfully,” not to mention the fact that they fulfilled a life long fantasy I have of proclaiming my love for someone in song form and have their response be of the musical variety as well. The Journey medley was an enormous success as it featured lots of sky reaching and even more sympathetic smiles to the kid in the wheelchair. If they didn’t prove themselves to be the most talented, they still stood out as the group you would most hope to befriend. Never underestimate how far congeniality can take you. Just ask Julia Roberts, $20 million a film later.
Oh and look Quinn’s mom is in the audience! Quinn’s mom approaches Quinn after the performance and tells her she has left her father and regrets ever abandoning her pregnant teenage daughter. This would have been a great time for Quinn to really let her mom have it and say something like “Mercedes is a better mother to me than you ever were! You don’t even know!” but instead her water broke and she gave birth.
While Quinn was delivering her baby, they continued to cut back to Vocal Adrenaline’s performance of “Bohemian Rhapsody” by Queen. Now I’m too dense to understand the possible metaphor or symbolism that was being created while Quinn screamed “Mama!” and Jonathan Groff harmonized “Mama” but either way it was a nice way to make the end of Quinn’s pregnancy realistic with the physical labor yet still musical. Brava.
Speaking of Vocal Adrenaline’s performance, it was out of this world. Maybe it was Ryan Murphy’s realization that if they were to win Regionals in season one, he wouldn’t have anywhere to go in season two and eventually he’d just give the lead men breast cancer to stir up some drama like he did in Nip/Tuck. But I hope that the conversation in the writers room focused more on the fact that Vocal Adrenaline has been presented as this unstoppable force, turning out pitch perfect performances year after year, and it’s going to take more than a group of misfits with big dreams to bring them down. Everyone loves an underdog but realistically, the arrangement, choreography, and production values that Vocal Adrenaline put out were in an entirely different league than either of the performances that preceded them at Regionals. They can’t lose just because Rachel became a more generous person and shared her “Don’t Stop Believin” solo with Santana and Kurt.
Now Sue Sylvester is anything but predictable these days, so it should have been, well, predictable, that when it came time for the judging, it wouldn’t be quite so easy for Sue to declare New Directions the losers. As soon as Olivia Newton John began her tirade about how being underprivileged or underfunded is no excuse for giving a cliche performance led by a brunette. Suddenly Sue finds herself in a position of defending New Directions, reminding ONJ that they’re just kids who don’t deserve this harsh ridicule. Like when you’re complaining to your friends about your family and suddenly they agree with you and start citing their own examples of how awful they think they are. Everyone knows only family can denigrate family. No one wants an outsider chiming in, not even Sue. Does this mean that Sue will officially become an outspoken supporter of the glee club? I imagine not. And why would we want that? Where would the laugh lines be if we didn’t have her comparing Will’s hair to a briar patch?
In the end, Vocal Adrenaline won Regionals and New Directions failed to place. Rachel appealed to her birth mom Idina Menzel to join New Directions in the fall as co-vocal coach but she declined because she was done with show choirs and needed to focus more of her attention on the baby she just adopted. From Quinn. This could be a point of conflict next season for Rachel but because it involves a guest star, I imagine that the writers actually thought they were tying the ends together nicely, giving it a sentimental Juno ending. Since New Directions returned home without a trophy, the club was supposed to be disbanded. As a thank you for the time they had together, they sang an awful song dedicated to Mr. Schuester. A note to Ryan Murphy for future seasons: even if the lyrics perfectly sum up a scene, don’t use a song that is on par with “True Colors” as the most bland song ever to be written. Then Sue goes to Principal Higgins and demands that the glee club be funded for another year. Everyone cheers and Mr. Schuester sees this as an excuse to take out his ukulele.
It seems unlikely that in its first season, Glee was able to deliver the standard 22 episode requirement of a network television series, considering the four month hiatus it was forced to go on. But then we remember that the pilot episode aired in May of 2009 so this truly has been an extended process, a labor of love for those of us who have followed it from the beginning. But with its conclusion I am reminded of one of the things I love most about television. The anticipation of a new season. Where do they go from here? What will they sing while they get there? Will Idina Menzel really keep the name Beth for her new baby? Because, ick.
Mr. Murphy, I await with bated breath.
Brittany Line of the Night:
Though Brittany was given a few lines of dialogue, none of them held a candle to our expectations. As I said last week, I am beginning to sense some conflict with this segment. Either Ryan needs to keep more of a spotlight on Brittany or I’m going to have to change this to the more generic “Line of the Night.” Let’s hope for the former. Tonight, I have two solutions. The first, similar to the week NPH was on, I give you Line of the Night from another guest starring blonde. This week, Olivia Newton John:
When Josh Groban was their age he was already in the Mickey Mouse Club…or something.
The second, and more entertaining solution, is a compilation of Brittany’s best material from season one. You’re welcome:
Song of the Night:
Faithfully by Journey
By now I’ve said almost too much of what I needed to say but this song to me was the best example of how far this group has come. When we first saw Finn and Rachel sing a duet accompanied by half as many students in episode one, it was fun and all but it lacked the emotion we saw tonight that came out of a true appreciation for the ways in which every individual has inspired the whole. It was impeccably sung as always but it also gave us the kind of resolution we wanted, to know that this group was bigger and better than any one competition. It felt like they all really had something on the line, something to prove, and had you been in the audience for the live performance, it could have easily brought you to tears.
Keep it up.
30 Rock Quote of the Day:
Dr. Spaceman: You know what, I’ll just remember it’s the opposite of what they say.
Milton: I’d really be more comfortable if you rewrote the forms.
Dr. Spaceman: No I’ll remember. Opposite! Opposite! Opposite!
Dear Tina 