Dear Tina,
While normally I try to keep it under the radar, with you I don’t feel like I have to hide my feelings. Many people disagree with me, my parents in particular pride themselves on being above it, but at some point in your life you have to be honest about what makes you truly happy. So I acknowledge proudly that I relish the time I spend on the couch watching Oprah Winfrey. Every second of it. To be honest, I don’t understand what people have against her. Can’t we all appreciate a seasoned interviewer taking an in depth look into the current events we only understand in an outline of the facts, Associated Press kind of way? How were we supposed to really understand the suffering going on in Haiti until we saw personal footage taken by Wyclef Jean accompanied by that perfectly timed single tear? And even when the topic may not be ripped from the headlines, what is the worst that can happen? You watch Nate Berkus play Mr. Mom? How is that not delightful?
Look at this week for instance. If I did not lead the life of a stay-at-home mom, I would have missed you and Steve Carrell on Tuesday, the entire cast of Glee on Wednesday, and couples with sexless marriages today. Er, I guess I could have gone without the latter. In any case, let’s take a look back.
First of all, Tina you looked great. The top you were wearing looked similar to one I myself own. Except yours was striped and mine is polka dotted and yours looked expensive and mine cost seven dollars. I also realized from watching you and Steve that the mark of truly talented comedians is when they can personally make the movie seem funnier than the trailer can. This is not to be interpreted as a criticism of Date Night because I haven’t seen it yet so what do I know? But the trailer markets the film as the kind of risk-free venture a Hollywood studio will happily throw money at because it contains enough one liners and surprise B-List actors in minor roles (hey! Was that Leighton Meester?!) to assure them a profit at the box office. To be perfectly honest, this past winter when I was in a movie theatre nearly once a weekend, I saw the Date Night trailer many times and had no interest in seeing it. Until I could hear you and Steve discuss your experience filming the movie and the kind of story you felt like you were telling, it had about as much appeal to me as the Fast and Furious series. Confession: I write-off pretty much any movie with a car chase scene in it with the exception of The Dark Knight. Oprah put the spotlight on your natural comedic chemistry and allowed the entire promotion of the movie to rely on reminding us how funny the two of you are, not even in the context of the film, just in general. A kind of “If you think they’re funny now…” approach to movie marketing. Also, thank you for including snippets from the gag reel. Equally entertaining, and in some cases more so, there is nothing I love more than a gag reel. I just wish more films would include them in their DVD bonus features. Can you imagine if Schindler’s List had a gag reel? Would have taken the edge off, right?
Then came Glee. I’m pretty adamant about not using the word ‘glee’ to describe how I feel about that show so if you think a pun is in the midst, it’s not. As I described to a friend of mine, the show opened with the cast performing “Somebody to Love” by Queen. Although I have listened to this version 58 times on my iPod, according to my iTunes play count, I was so overwhelmed by the return of my long lost friend that several times it felt like I was going to choke on my own excitement. The fact that I was eating a bowl of cereal simultaneously did not help. It felt like the first day back at school when you’re expectations for reuniting with everyone you hadn’t seen over the summer are exceeded when you actually encounter each other for the first time in months. And again this is what I love about Oprah. If this were any other talk show, you would be lucky to have, max, two cast members on to talk about Glee‘s return to primetime (Tuesdays on FOX 9/8c) and they would be the follow-up guest to Jane Fonda talking about all the plastic surgery she’s had done and subsequently regrets. Oprah gives you the entire cast, the creator, a performance, and a set decorated in the style of a choir room. She even had bulletin boards with those corny borders teachers staple to them on the back wall. It was a visual masterpiece. Call me overdramatic but if I can’t get excited over the NCAA tournament or the start of baseball season, let me have this. The most promising moment came when creator Ryan Murphy responded to Oprah’s question “What happens when they graduate?” with the answer “They never will.” Thank you. We all know what happens when television shows try to make the leap from high school to college. Cory and Topanga move into a special dorm for married couples and Mr. Feeny magically becomes a professor at the college they attend. Kelly Taylor becomes addicted to cocaine. The authority figure is no longer the goofy principal, Mr. Belding, but the Billy Ray Cyrus inspired Resident Advisor, Mike (because when an RA tells a resident to do something, they do it). So it is refreshing to hear a series creator use our suspension of disbelief to his advantage and allow us to follow this group of actors into their mid-thirties yet never making the fictional students leave the halls of William McKinley High School. I have to say I could have done without the real-life show choir performance from a high school in California toward the end of the episode. We all know they exist in real life. I still have the garment–one part dress, two parts shoulder pads–in my closet to prove my participation in such a group. But don’t spoil the pleasure of Glee by reminding us how annoying show choirs are in reality.
Finally, where would the The Oprah Winfrey Show be without Oprah exposing the most intimate details of a couple’s failed relationship on national television every now and again? Probably more episodes about families that eat in front of the television. Today Oprah paraded out another one of her mentors to “living your best life,” Dr. Laura Berman–likely to have her own show within the next 1-2 years–to discuss the dysfunctional sex lives of two couples. The first woman said that it made her skin crawl to even think about kissing her husband. The second couple hadn’t had sex in two and a half years. Both couples have children. WILL SOMEONE THINK OF THE CHILDREN? I understand that the idea of free advice from a leading expert and the promise of a makeover from the Oprah team sounds appealing, but they are crazy to think this airing out of their dirty laundry will not affect their children. Even if their children are young when they appear on air, they will eventually find out about this stint. And there is nothing more traumatic for adolescents than the reminder that their parents have sex. If a sexless marriage has put you on the brink of divorce then yes please, by all means, hire a sex therapist. I just don’t condone inviting Oprah, and the millions of viewers lollygagging behind her, to join in on the therapy. I did like when Oprah commented to Dr. Berman that she must have the most amazing sex life because I was thinking the same thing the entire time.
Oprah: one television personality’s generic talk show is another woman’s 2.7 billion dollar net worth.
30 Rock Quote of the Day:
Liz: I know, I’m terrible. But Brian sucks. He doesn’t have a TV and he wears political T-shirts.
Dear Tina 